A Modern Day Christmas Carol

Old Russ Sweet was as dead as a doornail. And while that might bring a welcome relief to some, it isn’t to me. One of my favorite Christmas stories is the one spun by Charles Dickens, A Christmas Carol. It is a tale not so much about the miserly old skin flint, Ebenezer Scrooge, as it is about his redemption. If only all of us could have such a dramatic second chance to get it right. This Christmas it seems like I have been visited by my own ghosts of Christmas past, present and future. It isn’t quite the same way as old Ebenezer. But it has happened in way. So permit me this small digression into my own modern day Christmas Carol.


To set the stage, let me just say that as I write this, I am kind of on the verge of tears. It’s been that kind of day. No, it’s been that kind of fall. No, even that isn’t accurate. It’s been that kind of season, year, decade, life. No matter how hard I try, I just can’t seem to really focus on what’s truly important about this time of year. There is this panic that sets in sometime about October where I start to think about how busy things are going to get from about Halloween until well into January. So much to do. . . so little time. This year was particularly stressful because we decided it would be a good time to renovate our rental. And there you have it – a recipe for depressing disaster. As I sat in church this morning, I reflected on my own increasing level of irritability, melancholy and just plain old fashioned stress. I realized that once again, I forgot what this is all about. I’ve heard the pleas a hundred times over the years. “Remember the reason for the season.” And yet, here I was trying to grasp at something that has eluded all of us way too often.

The Ghost of Christmas Past

My Ghost of Christmas Past was visited on me the moment I started to imagine and plan for Christmas 2011. It’s been a tough go these past three Christmases. Two days after Christmas in 2008 my wife’s mom passed away. A year later in 2009, we were still trying to get through that first anniversary. Last year we were a mere five months out from my brother’s death trying to put on a brave front and celebrate anyway (Christmas was his holiday). I just wanted this year to be different. But, life happens. A nephew is in Afghanistan, the economy’s trying to recover, we’re trying to remodel a house, and the kids are in crisis, blah, blah, blah. Little things become big things. I can’t find the outdoor lights from last year, the lighted buck won’t light up and the office party at my house is a week away and I haven’t gotten my act together. I’m starting to unravel. Correction! My wife would say that I am completely unraveled. Thank God for her optimism.

The good news about all of the stuff that goes wrong in any one event we plan is that what we remember are only the things that went right. I’d like to think of it as divine forgetfulness. I don’t know who put this out there, but a flawless plan for anything is inherently flawed. In other words, the perfect holiday is as elusive as unicorns and the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. It didn’t happen then and it isn’t happening now.

The Ghost of Christmas Present

Today is that friendly reminder that in order to truly celebrate Christmas, we need to remember what it’s all about. Yes, Jesus is the Reason for the Season. I get that. But, there are gifts to buy, cookies to bake, parties to throw and attend, and oh, by the way, don’t forget to celebrate, Celebrate, CELEBRATE! So, like everyone else on the planet, I’m trying to create something memorable out of the chaos of the entire holiday buzz. Add to that that I suffer from peoplepleasinitis, a condition by which one takes personal responsibility for everyone else’s happiness and what do you get? A weeping fool curled up in the fetal position and lying in a corner. What went wrong? What is going to go wrong? The holidays will come and go and I won’t be any happier or fulfilled than I am right now. Or will I????

The Ghost of Christmas Future

It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that chasing illusions will only lead to a lot of wasted effort and fatigue. What’s real is that Christmas isn’t about children getting everything on their endless wish list. It isn’t about trying to recreate memories of years gone by or mimicking the plotline of a warm holiday movie. It isn’t even the gathering of family and friends for a good old fashioned Norman Rockwell moment. While all of that might be fun and exciting, it doesn’t even come close to what Christmas is about.

Today, I received news from a young man, whom I came to know this past fall, about the birth of his son. I congratulated him. He sent me back a text letting me know how much our friendship meant to him. I wept. (I told you it was an emotional day.) It occurred to me that if you strip away all of the unmet (and met) expectations of a holiday, what’s left are moments of connection with one another in ways that seem so insignificant and yet are so profound. Even more is that we aren’t distracted from connecting deeply with our Creator. It came down to a decision. Do I just keep trying to keep trying? Or do I let go of the elusive dream in favor of living in the moment, no matter how imperfect it is? Next week there will be friends and family gathered at my house to celebrate Christmas. We will attempt to serve a nice meal and we might even break out the fine china. The house is decorated warmly. But every one of the guests and the host are fallible human beings. Something will not go as planned. And that will have to be okay. Like Ebenezer Scrooge, I hope this season is a season of redemption for me as it was for him in Dickens’ old yarn. Let it be said like this:

“. . . and it was always said of him, that he knew how to keep Christmas well, if any man alive possessed the knowledge. May that be truly said of us, and all of us! And so, as Tiny Tim observed, God Bless Us, Every One!”